Thinking about The Rules

This week I stumbled on some of The Rules coaches' blogs, ended up buying two Rules books, and read them in their entirety between Friday and Saturday. A lot of their tips I do naturally, but I'm curious now what the results would be if I applied them very strictly with the guys I'm dating.

"Arms" from my last post has been a real sweetheart and even spent part of Christmas with me (his idea). He seems like he doesn't date a whole lot and is more casual about dating, so I'm worried that if I keep waiting for him to initiate everything (texts, dates, etc.) that soon he won't try anymore because he thinks there isn't a chance/I'm not interested because I never contact him first. According to The Rules, I'm overthinking it, because if Arms likes me enough, he won't be too shy to keep initiating contact. So far, since the first day I've met him, I've started a few conversations, but he's started most of them, so I feel like if I start my rules on him now it won't be too much of a change.

Also though, I met him on Tinder, which I feel changes things too. If he sees that I log in every other day, I worry he might think I'm constantly hunting for someone else, like I don't think he's good enough. I know it's terrible that I think this way, because the mindset I need to have is that I should browse to my heart's content until I'm locked down by one guy!

Another Tinder guy - we'll call him Foodie - took me out for a really expensive dinner a couple weeks ago for our first date. He's shorter than I normally go for - in my 3.5 inch heels I think I was a little taller than him - and I noticed he has weirdly tiny hands. Anyway, I felt like since he spent so much money on me (his idea) and was a nice guy, that I was obligated to keep talking to him. I didn't really like him that much, so I returned his texts at first then ignored his multiple attempts at contact for nearly a week. He was so persistent, though, that it was kind of a turn-on - so I did finally answer him.

His first attempt was a last minute try to get me to meet him and his friends out at a bar. He's done this before but I've never gone. So this time, he told me he just got an amazing new job, so I told him to let me know where he ends up and I might meet him out for a drink. Now that I agreed, of course, he didn't say anything for the rest of the weekend. Then, a couple days later, he asks if I'm in town for Christmas, and I tell him I'll be around later in the week. So he texts me the day after Christmas, at 9pm, asking what I'm up to because he was in my neighborhood.

I waited long enough to give him a reasonable amount of time to drive back out of my area, then told him I was still at the gym and had to go to work in the morning. We started talking about this movie we both want to see, and he told me to let him know when I want to see it.

What am I supposed to do with that?!

I want to see it, but I'd go to the movies by myself before I'd ask him out on a date. I am not asking him out!

I'll let you know how this new dating strategy works out.

Arms, mysterious travelers, and warm bodies

Well, the "older" guy I mentioned in my last post turned out to be needy and desperate, so I "nexted" that boy.

In other news, I joined Tinder last month, and I actually love it. I think it's way better/easier than the dating sites, and I've met a few really great guys so far!

My third Tinder date was a guy who upfront told me he lived in another state (across the country) but wanted to meet up before he left. He visits my city for business on an almost monthly basis, and it turns out he lives very close to my parents. So I just went ahead and agreed to go out with him. He was a very sociable guy (for his job he literally just has to schmooze with execs and business people all day), and I've never genuinely laughed so much at a guy's jokes before. After our date we went back to the bar at his hotel and all his clients and coworkers were there... He was just ridiculous - he was trying to kiss me on one of the couches off to the side of the bar, and I was like, "Are you sure you want to do this here, in front of all your work people?" He just said back, "Oh, they're not looking, don't worry!" and proceeded. Highly entertaining guy. It's really too bad he doesn't live here.

And I'll admit, I kind of liked being paraded around in front of his coworkers, like some sort of trophy wife.

I also have a work romance going on...hahaha. The guy is only going to be at my facility temporarily, but we met on Tinder. We'd been talking for a couple weeks and didn't end up running into each other at work, so one day we finally just went for it and arranged to meet up in our building. The first thing I noticed in person was his arms....omg amazing. I don't like super muscular guys, but his arms are perfect - he had on short sleeves, where the end of the sleeve stopped in just the right spot, and his smile is adorable. So we've kept seeing each other since that first meeting, and things are going well right now. The downside of the work romance is that now I have to look good at work every day (before I'd essentially just roll out of bed and go), and now I'm going to want to kiss him when I see him at work...but we'll be at work. Haha he said he has a secret extra office....maybe we will make use out of that. ;)

Blue texted me on Friday night - it was before midnight but I'm assuming he was drunk. It's been two whole months and he hasn't said a word. We never even broke up. Thankfully, I have other guys I'm very excited about, so I ignored Blue's text and plan to continue doing so.

I have plenty more updates, and it seems like all these guys - new and old, Blue included - have come crawling out this weekend. They must just want a warm body to cuddle with since it's finally getting cold here.