Thursday, April 2, 2015

Don't Worry!

I think the main motivation for this post today was to avoid worrying anyone - rest assured, I passed my drug screen and have received the official invitation to start my internship this summer. The day of the drug screen was pretty great. I had the week off of school, so after suffering through holding my bladder all night and morning until the testing center opened at 9, I rewarded myself with breakfast at my favorite brunch spot. Normally Dreamy takes me there, but he doesn't like to go to the same restaurants more than one or two times; so now I have to take myself there.

Sometimes I still feel like I am in middle school. One of the guys at school will be going to my internship company as well, but full-time, this summer. He helped me out with the process, and I arranged another time to talk with him to get pointers before the interview. Talking with him proved to be really helpful, and I told him so; I ended up being the only one at my school this year to receive a spot in the company's internship program. I didn't talk to him again when I learned that I would be going to the final round interviews in California, and I didn't speak with him either after I received and accepted the internship offer.

The awkward thing, though, is that he sits behind me in one of my classes, and he hasn't said anything to me, either. I am almost positive that by now he knows we'll be at the same company, in the same office (we won't be California-based, though) this summer, but he has not congratulated me or acknowledged it at all. Since we haven't talked in weeks, it feels even more awkward to bring up the subject now. I feel like a little kid with how I handle things sometimes. I should just stop being held back by silly thoughts and just chat with him about it, but I am shy and I think he is, as well, and won't say anything first.

In other news, I cannot wait to graduate. I have two semesters left after the current one, but I'm so ready to move to a new, nicer apartment and start spending some paychecks on various gadgets. I have been obsessive lately with checking out apartments online (and even stalker-ishly planning walks by new apartment buildings without going inside) for units I know I won't be able to afford until 2016. I loved my current apartment before I got the dog, but now that I'm walking the pup around outside constantly, I notice the cheap and outdated aspects and the shabby upkeep of the landscaping. I have been there almost two years now, so I'm ready for a new view. The new apartment complexes popping up keep showing me all the things I don't have. Just goes to show that even when you get the grad school, guy, and dog you wanted, you still want more; I am trying to realize that getting the next thing will never feel like the end, so it's best to be grateful for what I have rather than live for the future.

1 comment:

  1. I'm glad you got the internship and the drug test went well. Congratulations!!!

    It's weird about the guy but sometimes people are odd like that. A girl in my class was competing for a resident advisor on campus with me last year and the moment I got it, she stopped talking to me! After getting over my initial shyness I tried to talk to her but she kept snubbing me, so I gave up. But I'm sure this guy will be different!

    Funny isnt it, how you can be grateful but then at the same time want to achieve more? But I think that is a healthy sign that you're evolving and changing with the times. It shows you develop as a person and aren't just stagnating in life. It's great to hear from you!