What actions say

Ever since I dated Paolo, I get a little anxiety about staying overnight at a guy's place. Paolo and I dated for six months, yet he never stayed a full night at my apartment - he would always "have to leave" for some reason or another. I only stayed over at his place for the full night once, and the other times he'd end our date after a couple of hours, saying he had plans with friends or had to get some work done from home (he did have a very demanding job). Part of me liked that he stayed busy, but the other part wondered how long it would be before he would finally make more time for me. When I would hang out at his place, he would drop subtle hints that he wanted me to leave - so I would.

No guy since has the boundary quirks that Paolo did, but his actions still stay in my head sometimes; I wonder if other guys really don't want the girl they are dating to invade their space by staying over. Thankfully, Dreamy is different. When we cooked dinner at his place on date four, we both had work the next morning. I finally said that I should get going, but he told me I could stay. I asked him if he was sure it wouldn't disrupt his sleep, but he assured me it would be fine. Our fifth date (the most recent) was a Sunday night, and he had a very early morning flight to catch the next day. I didn't want to keep him up, so I told him I was sleepy and about to head home. He ignored me and told me to go lie down. The next morning, he was putting on his work clothes (hot!) after his shower, and I stood up and started getting ready to leave. It was very, very early still. He told me I could go back to sleep and that he would wake me up once he was ready, then drive me to my car on his way out. So I climbed back in bed and he awoke me later, pushing back my hair and giving me a sweet kiss.

He wasn't the least bit worried that I was in his space, even right before work/catching a flight. Maybe it doesn't seem like a big deal to most people, but it meant a lot to me. I can tell how I really feel about a guy when he is in my space, in my apartment, while I'm getting ready for work. If I get a "I wish he would get the hint and leave" feeling, then that's telling. If I find myself wanting to offer him breakfast, then that's telling as well. With guys like Paolo, I wouldn't even be allowed in their space on a work morning. In contrast, Dreamy was calm and sweet and made me feel so comfortable.

Dreamy also loves to talk before going to bed. It's so attractive to me - we talk about really big things, and he's the one that brings them up. He impresses me so much because I've dated so many guys who don't have much to talk about after we get to know each other. Dreamy and I will be up until entirely too late, hours past my normal bedtime, until it's just him telling me adorable stories, with me sleepily and barely responding - exhausted but still wanting to be awake with him. I may have felt like a zombie at work after the last few times we've stayed up like that, but it was completely worth it. It afforded me more time with him.

Sigh... Somehow dating the coolest guy ever makes me feel even better about myself, instead of feeling less secure. I should start letting him know I really appreciate him, but I don't compliment him or flatter him much... I think I've done a good job of non-verbally letting him know I like him, but otherwise I've been playing it cool. I'm a big fan of this one though, if you couldn't already tell.