Wednesday, October 21, 2015

Oh goodness, there's more

Surprise! After weeks and weeks and weeks, Chase and I finally had another accidental run-in. On our way out towards uptown, my roomie mentioned that we were going to stop at Lee's (Chase's friend's) house to pick Lee up. Once we hopped over to the second bar of the night, in walks Chase. I would have loved to see my facial expression - I know it was a mix of fake annoyance, real annoyance, and shock. We greeted each other with a hug and then swiftly began avoiding each other, keeping on opposite sides of the group. Neither of us had been trying to talk to each other since our last conversation, so I think neither of us was sure what the other was thinking.

At the next bar, we started acting a little more cordial towards each other, and at one point when it was just us two talking, I mentioned something funny (but kind of bad) that had happened to me. He was like, "I have to hear the story behind this!" and we went outside and talked a little more. He started holding my hand as we would walk through the crowds, and finally, this was a night where he didn't drink too much but was still having fun.

At the end of the night, my roomie and I got into a cab with Lee and Chase, and there was a lot of debate about where we'd be going. Chase ended up winning, telling the driver that he wanted to be dropped off at his apartment. I was a little disappointed, because even though I knew things were kind of over between us, I still hadn't gotten a kiss - and he is so good at it so I really missed that. I was also disappointed because he had never invited me over before, and it seemed like he wanted to keep it that way.

When we pulled up to the apartment, Chase got out, and Lee gave me a nudge and a couple words hinting that I should get out of the car too. "Should I really get out?" I whispered, and Lee replied, "YES!"

I got out of the car and told Chase that Lee had practically pushed me out of the car and said I wasn't allowed to come with them. To my delight, Chase didn't look bothered one bit. He just said, "Okay!" It was nice - I was worried he would tell me he was tired or make some excuse why he didn't want me to come in with him. I'm not sure if he was surprised or not that I was coming home with him, because he brought up that he'd seen another guy in the group talking to me earlier that night and thought something was going on with us. It made me giggle that he'd noticed and that he didn't know how much of a weakness I had had for him (Chase).

I also had wanted to come over for forever because I hadn't met his dog yet (who ended up being so sweet and adorable!). We took the dog for a walk and then, back inside, proceeded to do good but bad things.

I don't regret it. It was good, and I had a lot of fun. Now that I know what to expect from our communications (i.e., little to nothing), it makes things much easier for me. The next day, I was left with the feeling that I kind of got what I wanted - it was almost closure, even, around all the hopes I had had about him previously. I wouldn't mind more makeouts or fun nights with him, but I was so worried, and even mad at Lee, about Chase not wanting me because of a past hookup with Lee. Now that I know that wasn't the issue, it makes me feel like a lot of the reasons behind Chase's inaction were not about me.

The other reason I am at peace with all things Chase is because I'm talking to someone new - someone who is extremely good-looking, kind, and most of all, who wants to communicate with me. The funny thing is he has the same name (in real life) as Chase (which is an alias). I matched with this new guy on two different dating apps, and I will meet him for real this Friday. Sometimes I hate texting, but I've had so much fun messaging with this new guy - and if both the attraction and communication are there are in real life as well, this date could go very well. More soon!


  1. Though it's good you have closure with Chase, my unsolicited advice/opinion is to avoid any FWB situation. You have chemistry and some feelings - you'd date him if he were into you - and that can go south quickly. Just in my experience, from my own life and what I see in friends, it can be a sticky situation.

    1. Thanks, your opinion is always welcome here! I wish I saw Chase during the day as part of my regular routine; since I only seem to run into him at night, at bars, I definitely see how easy it would be to fall into a FWB situation. :'( Thinking about the consequences of falling into that (thanks for influencing me to think about that!) hopefully will help me protect myself.