Personal Space Invader

Back when I was dating Paolo, I kind of felt like my life was "set." I didn't feel the need to make plans with friends as often anymore, and I would keep my weekends open until Paolo and I had our dates scheduled. I drifted away from so many people - I was so content from being around him that not too much else mattered to me.

Now that we've broken up, I've been going out a lot. It's nice to do whatever I want, knowing that I'm 110% single. I loooove going out dancing, so not too long after the breakup, a girlfriend and I went to a new club and danced it up. We went to another strip of bars after, and I danced like a crazy woman (I am so awesome at this particular dancing technique) until we closed out the bar. Soon after some really tall dude put his hands on my shoulders (couldn't decide whether it was hot-aggressive or creepy-aggressive) and started a conversation. We talked for less than 60 seconds before I had to leave to jump in our taxi, and I hesitated to give him my number, but he insisted so I did it.

He was kind of goofy when he texted me later in the weekend, but it seemed friendly and not flirty. When he suggested we hit up a Mexican place for margaritas on a weeknight, I took it as just fun times hanging out with a new friend.

When I walked into the bar, Tall Dude was already there. He came up front to meet me and then led me back to where he was camped out, but the chair he pulled out for me was so close to his. I tried to pull away a little bit without being obvious, but we were still sitting way too close to each other. In less than five minutes of being there, he's holding my hand. At that point I was really like, WTF?! Holding hands is so cute when you adore a guy, but I was so creeped out. The conversation kind of stopped flowing because I just lost interest. I decided I was not into him like that, and I'd come mentally prepared to meet a new friend, not for a date.

After 45 minutes at the first bar, he suggested we go to a different place up the road. We walked outside, and after only 46 minutes of knowing me he decides to kiss me. He's so effing tall, and his stature so overpowering, that there was nothing I could do. I kept my mouth shut and waited for it to be over. I thought it would have been really bitchy to split after being with him for such a short time, so I followed him in my car to the next bar. Several times while I was driving, I considered turning around and just going home.

Normally I am so good at saying no to guys, and I hate this, but after 20 minutes at the next bar (I ordered water instead of alcohol, hahaha), he suggested we go to his apartment right behind the bar. I tell him I'm tired, I really need to go to bed, that I need to get up at 6, etc., but he's not having it. "I'm just going to show you that YouTube video I was telling you about - you have to see it, and right after that you can leave!" he says. I tell him fine, but I can only stay for five minutes.

The video was boring as hell, and it was definitely at least five minutes (of martial arts). (I even tried to sit on a different couch than him but he made me sit next to him...ughh no...) His life revolves around martial arts and I find it bone-dry boring. After hearing him talk, I might even hate it as much as I hate football (although I know myself well enough that if it were coming from my dream guy, there would be no ill feelings). Tall Dude introduced me to his hot roommate, which was exciting, but I was quickly let down when Hot Roommate's girlfriend came downstairs so they could leave - leaving Tall Dude and I, unfortunately, alone. Of course, I see Hot Roommate drive away in a freaking Porsche. Damn! (Tall Dude drives something dumpy and not even close to a Porsche.)

Quickly I told Tall Dude I needed to leave, and he tried to kiss me again. I stood still and endured the kiss for a few seconds, but decided I would never see him again so I should test how he is at making out. I tried to get into it, but he sucked, so I left and never responded to any of his text messages again.

I totally understand if you're drunk at a bar/club and pretty quickly get "friendly" with a guy - but if you're sober, didn't agree your meeting was a date, and you've known the guy for less than 10 minutes, a guy trying physical gestures that suggest you're a couple is not okay. Just creepy and gross!